....And to all a good night

Merry Christmas!

I hope everyone has an exciting and safe holiday. Cherish this time you have with your loved ones; I will speak to you soon!

~ Amanda

Where'd you get yer learnin'?

When I was in school my teachers always said one key way to know if you should trust a website was to check for misspellings and poor grammar...

...what happens when that website is CNN? Doesn't their tag line even say you can trust them? If so, WHY must they do this?

12/19/2008 from CNN.com: M.E.: It's Cayee, and it's a homicide.
Not to make this any worse than it already is, but the girl's name, it's Caylee with an "L".

12/10/2008 from CNN.com:
"He recalled another occasion in which he and another boy decided to get drunk. They mixed orange juice with rubbing alcohol. It make Middleton sick and his friend intoxicated."

Really CNN, it make him sick?

What has this world come to? I am thoroughly disappointed.

Good News

The Good News is,

if you're awake, you're alive.

The bad news is,

you have to get out of that comfy bed,

find something to wear,

and at least try to be someone who is pleasant to be around...

I've been tagged!

I've been tagged by my friend from high school, Lorelle. The instructions for this tag are to pick the 4th picture folder on my computer; choose and post the 4th picture; explain the picture; and tag 4 other people to participate.

This picture is from this summer. It was my 28th Birthday and I was on my way to work. It was a pretty great day considering. When I got to work my friends made me a cake (German Chocolate, my favorite) and gave me a gift certificate to Target. Then when I got home the kids had made me a beautiful strawberry cake... b/c that's apparently what I wanted. I also got flowers all the way from Birmingham, it was a wonderful birthday surprise!

Now I tag:

Tommy Terrell

Lauren Duffy

Jasika Nicole

Lana Carlson

A little premature

I know it's not quite the time, but I've been thinking about my New Years Resolutions and I'm ready to put them out there.

I've spent the last year doing things for me. A little selfish, yes, but definitely worth it. I quit smoking. I started working out. I even did a 5k! (not very well, but at least I finished) I'm becoming more responsible for myself, my actions, and maybe for others around me. I am paying bills and have bought a car (well, I'm paying for it). It's really a total 360 from one year ago. I may not have everything I need or want but I'm getting there, and I'm doing it right.

This year, just like every other, I resolve to work out more (get a new gym membership) and be healthier in all my decisions. I will save more and be more diligent in my financial decisions. I will say "yes" as much as I can. I need to make it a point to get out and do more. See my friends more and meet (and reconnect with) more people. I also plan to travel. I have one trip already set up for January and am planning another for the end of February. A friend is planning to visit me sometime in between.

Everything is looking up and I'm excited about the prospects of a new year.

To snitch or not to snitch

If you know me, you know that I can't stand a liar. That being said, I have a moral delima. Where I work on Sundays we don't punch a clock. We just write our measly few hours on a sheet and turn them in every week. If our supervisor isn't there, it's my job to turn in the time sheets. Last week I noticed something.

If I get to work early I will hang out in the nursery until it's time for me to go upstairs (about 9:15 or 9:20). I didn't go upstairs until closer to 9:30 this past week because I needed to make sure there was another person in the nursery. When I picked up the time sheets in the afternoon, this woman's sheet said she got there at 8:30.

Here's my delimma. She lied. It's possible she's lied every week since she's been working. But these 3 little hours are the only ones she works in a week. This is my 2nd job and I am just getting by. Do I do the right thing and tell someone that she is lying? Or do I let her keep doing it because she really does need those extra few dollars?

Did I mention this is a church?

Weigh-in Wednesday

They did it again! How do Shelli Yoder all all the fine folks at the EDCT know exactly what I need to hear at exactly the right time?

I tend to be quite ambiguous in a lot of my posts because I'm still not exactly sure I want everything up here for all the world to see, but I do know that I like to write things out. Well, this speaks to my post from earlier today. A lot of stupid things beyond my control have really messed up my outlook for the next few weeks and/or months. I'm working through it. This helps.

Amid the complexities of this world, the financial concerns of the future, our relationships, our lives, it is easy to let ourselves become overwhelmed and anxious. We receive few reminders that we have all we need for this moment, right here, right now. Poet David Whyte offers us a rare prompt in the following poem to think differently. Through the unknown, may we remain open to being...enough.

ENOUGH

Enough. These few words are enough.

If not these words, this breath.

If not this breath, this sitting here.

This opening to the life

we have refused

again and again

until now.

Until now.

-David Whyte

Today

has been a very important day to grow and to think about wrong turns I have made in the past.

They always come back to haunt you.

I am very tired of being punished for things that are and were entirely out of my control. I hate that I, for once, have my shit together but that it's always something. I have been trying to turn that around for a year. I was well on my way to doing so - until yesterday when things began to unravel, then of course things fell completely apart today... Unfortunately for me there is nothing I can do to reverse the situation, I just have to grin and bear it.

Again, I vow to turn things around. Everything I do is for me - not anyone else. If it takes me picking up the pieces from someone elses trash - so be it.

I LOVE Stupid People

***I Received a copy of this flyer in my email today***

IS OFFERING:

TWO FREE LESIONS!!!

WITH THE PURCHASE OF TWO LESIONS

and the purchase of an instrument
it’s buy 2 get 2!!!

Lady,

I'm sorry that you are sad. I know he lived a long life and I know he was sick. I know you knew it was coming...but so soon? I wish I knew what to do for you. It's okay to let it out. It's okay to be sad. Don't feel like you have to be the strong one and hold everyone together. You don't. Everyone else will be okay, just like you will. Continue to watch over everyone but most of all watch out for yourself. He will do the same. I love you lady and am here for you. Please let me know what I can do to help.

(I'm sure I can make some sort of mean casserole....isn't that what you're supposed to do?)

Happy Election Day

I have been pretty quiet this election season... I've had everything political shoved down my throat for, I don't know, the past 3.5 - 4 years. So I took a break. Regardless I know that it's my duty as an American to exercise my right to vote -and that may be the only exercising I do all week so I better do it! If you're in Alabama and don't know where you're registered go to Alabama Votes to get all the information you may need and even a sample ballot. I hope everyone goes out to day and gets this job done...and may the best man win (of course we all know who that is!!)

Happy Halloween!

Although one might not know by my actions, Halloween might just be my favorite time of year. I volunteered at Boo at the Zoo last weekend and worked at the Church Halloween Ball Wednesday. They were both GREAT! I love seeing all the creative costumes - both children's and adult's - unfortunately mine didn't fall in the category. I am okay with that.

Last night was possibly my favorite night since I've moved - no offense to my girls b/c we always have a great time! I saw so many people last night that I haven't seen in ages and I loved every minute of it. I went to the Dude's house and saw his beautiful pregnant wife, and my MG and David and their 2 awesome kids. The Dude cooked! I know! I couldn't believe it either. This is the guy who used to say 'I'll buy the ingredients...but I won't make the meal' when we had Thanksgiving Dinner and other meals. I was impressed to say the least. We caught up and it was excellent. I missed those guys so much!!

Then on my way home I got a call from an old friend... we dated almost five years ago and have recently reconnected. Somehow it slipped my mind to tell him when I moved. Oops! I totally thought he knew. He and his friend, who I love, came over and it was great! It was all a little surreal. He was in my kitchen. He was on my couch. We talked for hours! It was almost like no time had passed. Almost.

All in all I had an amazing night! ...and to think I almost bailed on the whole evening.

For those who may be wondering...

It's been a long time since my last post.... sorry.

Just a quick update. I have moved and am settling in to my new place and new job. I love being back near my friends and family (although they may disagree). I have a "roommate" although we don't share rooms or even places... really, he's my landlord. James. He's pretty super! I still need a few more things to complete the "home" but for now everything is wonderful. I love being able to have my friends over and for them to feel comfortable and welcome. It's a great feeling!

Nothing too extraordinary is going on, but hopefully I'll have more resources soon enough so that I can post the mundane in the meantime.

A sigh of relief

I am moving...in one week...

I have been stressing like you wouldn't believe. I have tons to do at work and seem to be making very little headway. AND I have been preoccupied trying to find a place (within my budget) to live. I realized that you can't get too much with a small budget, but I really wasn't asking for much...a dishwasher and a place that takes pets (a cat to be exact). You wouldn't believe how hard that is - especially from 3.5 hours away! My mother has been more than helpful, contacting people and looking at properties for me, but nothing was working! There was one place that I thought would be great, but it was actually a little too shady, and after the girl told me for a week and a half there was a dishwasher...there wasn't!

Completely unimpressed, I continued to search. I found another place, two actually, that met my requirements and were within, or around, my budget. But it turns out that I couldn't get in (a special thanks to someone who helped ruin my credit. I appreciate it. Really.).

That was my week. I found out I couldn't get in to my next to last resort yesterday, one week before I needed to have keys to my new place. One week. Needless to say my stress level rose like you wouldn't believe. And I was so preoccupied with trying to find a place to live that I got very little work done yesterday. This stressed me out even more, since it was already a short week.

Well.... today I continued with my plans of buying things to put in a place that I don't have. I went to Macys today and racked up on essentials for my nonexistent kitchen. (I did well) Then I went to the zoo with my family for a little R&R, or at least a little excitement. The zoo was great! I saw so many animals I had never even seen! Unfortunately my camera died about 1/2 way through our nearly 5 hour trip. I was crushed.

I left the unbearable heat of the reptile house when my mother called...

She told me all my worries were over, I have a place!!!! Turns out her friend James has a great apartment available. It's a 2 bedroom and even has a washer and dryer. the rent includes all my utilities...oh, and it's furnished! This is the best news yet! Now I just have to finish packing...

Ode to The Dude

Dude, you are the nicest and most selfless guy I know. You are always there to help and to listen, no matter my indiscretions. I really appreciate you, probably more than you know. And, one day, I will try to return all the favors. Thank you. And thank you to your wife too.

I love you mister! (but not in that way)

Help Me!

I have apparently messed this little blog up and don't know how to fix it! I added a site feed so that everyone could learn the "Word of the Day" with me...well apparently that made it look like that's what I was blogging. I have gone in and deleted the RSS but it still looks like all I have to say is the WOD. How do I change it? Although I don't always have a lot to say, it is usually more than 1 word... 

Good News

I got a cell phone today! ...trust me, this is good news...

And that's fine

It's been a while since I've gotten a wonderfully thoughtful email that I felt I needed to pass on. The EDCT of TN sent this one and it really hit home for me, I know I'm not alone.

I'm in the middle of a big transition. I've been in the middle of it for quite a while now and I ended up where I am now because things "weren't fine". Since then, I could list a million things every day that also, weren't fine. Things just weren't what I had hoped for. Maybe it's because I have a continuous internal conflict between optimism and pessimism. Sometimes it makes for a difficult outlook. I try so hard to look for the good in situations and people; I can always offer a friend another, better way to look at things, but I have a hard time doing that for myself - or at least believing it when I do. As I begin yet another chapter I can reflect on what has been "fine" or even great since I've been here - I've made friends, I've reconnected with family, I've learned new things and visited new places, I've gotten a car and have had a place to lay my head. Now I am able to move on. I can reflect on what has been fine, good, or even great and I know that I'm alright.

Below is an excerpt from todays Weigh-In:

When things aren't as we'd hoped for, the temptation is to look at all the
things we can't do and the list of reasons why. The human ego always
encourages us to hold on to our limitations. It is easier to look at what
is wrong rather than stretch to what could possibly be just fine. If we
would see things as perfectly fine, just the way they are, no matter what they
are, we might realize we are fine too. For some of us, this is a far
stretch. But that's fine, and so are you.

Well Kids

The time has come.

The time is now,

To move back home,

But I don't know how...

It's the news we've all been waiting for! Mama I'm commin' home! I turned in my notice today and will be leaving Memphis Sept 14th. There is SO MUCH to do and SO LITTLE time to do it! I have so much work to finish here before I can leave (or at least before I will feel comfortable leaving). I can put basically everything I own in my car, because, as Jennifer so eloquently puts it, I am a nomad. I'm ready to put that lifestyle behind me (so I will be accepting donations of any sort).

I am looking for a place to live and for things to put in that place. I have a limited budget and a cat (also a need for clean dishes). If you have any suggestions, please, do tell!

...not exactly...

I guess my last post was a little harsh. I'm not really "over it"...I am to a point, but I'll survive - because I have to. There really are quite a few positive things happening in my life, but somedays it just seems like nothing will ever change. I thrive on change, but at the same time I find comfort in things staying the same. I hate being in limbo, which is what a lot of my posts talk about. Hopefully there's good news to come...

Also, I am going to Birmingham tomorrow to see all my "ladies". I am SO excited! Here's to a relaxing, fun-filled weekend!!

...I Quit...

I'm over it! I just want to throw that out there for anyone reading this. I'm over just about everything. Please pray for peace and an end to the restlessness.

My Sisters

I love these girls so much! I miss them more than words! It makes me so happy when we can spend time together. This picture is from the pool July 5th (which may explain my lack of make up).

Birmin'ham Birmin'ham greatest city in Alabam'

Because apparently some people don't know:

Yes, Birmingham, AL is a major metropolitan area.

Most people do not live inside the city-limits and therefore Birmingham's actual population is about 220,000. If you expand to what is known as Birmingham-Hoover Metropolitan Area, which includes the Over-the-Mountain areas, Hoover, and probably the Trussville area, Birmingham's population is estimated to be over 1.1 million people. If you go even further to include Greater Birmingham (or Birmingham-Hoover-Cullman combined statistical area) the population soars to include roughly 1/4 of Alabama's population!

According to a recent survey Greater Birmingham has more roadways than most other U.S. metropolitan areas, with the center being located at the convergence of 4 interstate highways (I-65, I-20, I-59, and I-459. I-22, known as "Corridor X" is currently under construction. There are also 2 U.S. Highways that run through the area Hwy 31 and Hwy 280.

Greater Birmingham is home to the largest and most affluent shopping centers and malls in Alabama. Many of the retailers have their exclusive Alabama location in the area. Major shopping centers include Riverchase Galleria, which, when built, was the largest mixed use project in the Southeastern United States and also has the world's longest skylight. The Summit is the largest open-air lifestyle center in the U.S. It is home to Alabama's only Saks and Belk's flagship store. Brookwood Village was one of the first shopping centers build outside of Birmingham proper. It has recently been renovated so that it would have a main-street appeal to its facade.

Birmingham ranks as one of the most important business centers in the Southeastern United States and is also one of the largest banking centers in the U.S. In addition, the Birmingham area serves as headquarters to one Fortune 500 company: Regions Financial. Five Fortune 1000 companies are headquartered in Birmingham.

I hope this helped to educate some of you who think that even Birmingham is small, rural, or po-dunk just because it is in Alabama.

This makes for something interesting

Well kids, I got a job. I'm not sure what to think about it. I am glad that the place I've been working day-in and day-out since January finally decided to hire me. But.... then there's the more important pending issue. I'm not too worried. I hate hurting people's feelings though. I knew this day would come sooner or later, but lately I've been hoping for "later". I still have my eyes on the prize though and hope to hear something soon. In the mean time, I've got to look out for number one...

What to say...about today

I can't say much, but today was pretty super! I'm working to learn patience, something that I've rarely used in my life, but am striving for now. It'll be a few weeks, maybe even a month. But there's a reason that nothing's happened (here) as of yet. Everything sounds positive and that's how I'm trying to remain...pray for me.

It's amazing...

...what you can learn from the Internet. This week I learned that my grandfather (my dad's dad) was the mayor of his city since 1995! I had no idea. He and his wife are also very philanthropic and apparently have been for years and years (maybe that's where I get it??). The town recently threw a celebration for him and his wife for their many years of service and dedication to Laurel Hill

Laurel Hill honors Doug & Estelle Rogers at reception
In recognition of their many years of combined service to Laurel Hill, the city honored former Mayor Douglas Rogers and his wife, Estelle Rogers, at a reception in the Fellowship Hall of the First Baptist Church. (May 17, 2008)

I haven't been in contact with this side of my family since I was about 12 (1992). I had no idea how well they were doing, or honestly, if they were even still living. It makes me happy to learn good news like this and has even made me consider including them in my letter writing... we'll see how that goes. I have included pictures from the celebration. (Top Left: Estelle and my grandfather awards in hand, Below Left to Right: (1) My dad; (2) My dad, Aunt Ginger and my cousin, Jordan; (3) Estelle, my grandfather, Aunt Ginger, Jordan (4) Laurel Hill HS Class of '45 my granddad left, Estelle right) My uncle John was also there, but I can't get any pictures with him to upload...technology.

Sunday Sunday Sunday

Boy do I have some exciting news....stay tuned...

pitter patter

Everyone I know is having a baby... well, that's not true, not even close actually, but there are quite a few bundles of joy coming right around the corner! I'm so excited about all these new babies and have found the most wonderful gifts for them... Pigtails & Polkadots , Angela (Morgan) Wimmer's monogram online store is wonderful! In addition to all the precious baby things, there are things for toddlers and even adults. I've already placed one order which received rave reviews and I'm getting ready to order 5 more things. I think that everyone needs something monogrammed! Angela can do special orders too, so check out her site and get to shopping!

I learned a new word

Peanutopolis (noun) - A state of mind making you feel very strong and powerful, almost mayor-like.

Is it worth it?

Some of you are privy to the fact that I have recently taken up letter writing... it's a more personal way to stay in touch with all the people that I miss! There's always email, yes. But there is something so wonderful about receiving a letter in the mail. The price of stamps rose a few months ago, I was a little upset - as I had just bought stamps and still had some left. Luckily for me, they didn't return my mail, insisting that I give them one more penny! I remembered today that I have been walking around for a week with 3 postcards in my purse and no postcard stamps. Who has postcard stamps? Apparently no one. I even went to the Post Office one day last week so that I could mail 3 large envelopes and 3 postcards. The line inside was very long so I opted for the machine where I could weigh my envelopes, buy postage for them and also buy stamps. After about 10 minutes, I discovered that you cannot buy post card stamps on this machine! I could get as many regular stamps as I wanted and I could get other random amounts - as long as they were at least $1.00. Needless to say, I still have the post cards in my purse. I'm about to bite the bullet, put a forever stamp on each and call them sent.

Give me half

I just read a story about a remarkable girl in Atlanta and I feel compelled to share:

By Rusty Dornin CNN

ATLANTA, Georgia (CNN) -- One day while driving with her father, Hannah Salwen noticed a Mercedes stopped next to a homeless man sitting on the curb.

"I said to my dad, 'If that guy didn't have such a nice car, then that guy could have a nice meal,' " the 15-year-old from Atlanta, Georgia, recalled.
And so began the tale of what the Salwen family calls "Hannah's Lunchbox." Watch why family wants to give away $800K »

It started as family discussions about what they needed versus what was enough. Hannah's father Kevin, an entrepreneur, is on the board of the Atlanta Habitat for Humanity and is no stranger to community work, but he said this family conversation was life-changing. "We stopped and paused and thought about what are the things in the world that could really make a difference, a little bit of difference in the world," he said. They talked about selling their cars or other things, but it was Hannah's mother, Joan, who came up with selling their 6,500-square-foot house, donating half the proceeds and then moving into a house half the size. For nine years, the family lived in a historic 1912 mansion near downtown Atlanta. It boasts five bedrooms, eight fireplaces, a kitchen that would make any cook jealous and even an elevator. See the new and old houses, side by side »
When Hannah would bring friends over, she said, often their jaws would drop and they'd gasp, "Wow, you live here?"
Like most teens, Hannah loves to shop, and she jammed every space of her massive walk-in closet full of clothes. But she also knows many people are less fortunate; she volunteers at a local community food bank and other relief agencies.
Joan Salwen, a teacher, said the mansion was her dream home. "It was a challenge," she said of giving up that house. "It was a test, almost, to see: How committed are we? I mean, how serious are these kids about what we should do? And they all nodded and there we were." So the Salwens put the house up for sale in May 2007 and started figuring out what they would do with half the proceeds, which would amount to more than $800,000. They spent six months researching charity organizations before deciding on the Hunger Project, an organization dedicated to helping end world hunger through people helping themselves. Hunger Project Vice President John Coonrod said the family met with organizers in New York and notified them months later that the charity was the winner.
When the Salwen house sells, the money will be channeled through the Atlanta Community Foundation over a six-year period and end up in Ghana, Coonrod said.
"This will underwrite a process in more than 30 villages to enable people to meet all of their basic needs on a sustainable basis," he said. "They will be able to grow enough food, to build clinics and schools, and the villagers will be doing the lion's share of the work."
Coonrod said he'd never heard of a family donating in this way.

"Hannah's awakening to social injustice, and her family's ability to make a difference in that issue will make a profound difference in the lives of tens of thousands of people," he said, estimating the money could affect more than 20,000 people in Ghana.
Hannah's 13-year-old brother, Joseph, was so impressed with his big sister's ideas that he made a three-minute video of the family's project. Watch Joseph's video
The video won the grand prize in the 2008 "My Home: The American Dream" contest, sponsored by Coldwell Banker and Scholastic Publishing.
In the video, Joseph tells viewers, "We're showing you can redefine the American dream."
But the Salwens' house has sat on the market for more than a year. It's a tough time to sell any house, let alone one with an asking price of nearly $1.8 million.
Real estate agent Sally George said she's shown the house 40 or 50 times, and there have been nibbles but no buyers. See the house's real estate listing
Many people are interested in the house's rich history but often don't know anything about the philanthropic aspects of the family's project.
"I've never handled a house selling for this reason," George said. "I didn't learn about what the family was doing until early this year."
Hannah and Joseph said most of their friends at school don't know about it. "We didn't do it for the fame or the glory," said Joan Salwen. "This was something Hannah sort of yanked us into."
Even though it was Joan Salwen's idea to sell the house, it has been tough for her to give it up. "I have to admit," she said, "I loved living in this house. Does that make me an evil person? I hope not because it's a beautiful place."
The family recently moved to a house less than half the size of their mansion four blocks away. While Hannah's friends called her old home the "wow house," this one is more ordinary and that's fine with her. Lately the family has spent a lot of time around the kitchen table talking about an upcoming two-week trip to Ghana. The Salwens will spend six or seven hours a day visiting the villages where their money will be put to work. Kevin Salwen said the new house is great, it's just smaller.
"We as Americans have so much," said Salwen, a former Wall Street Journal writer. "We love the concept of half. We are going from a house that's 6,000 square feet to a house that's half the size, and we're giving away half the money.
"And we do think everyone can do something if they think through half."

[Don't Miss Family Web site: Hannah's Lunchbox The Hunger Project In Depth: CNN Heroes Impact Your World: Learn how you can help someone ]

The Salwen family realized they could live richly with only a portion of what they had. Most Americans live with such excess and don't even realize it. I have witnessed people with nothing and people with more than they know what to do with, I, myself have fallen into both categories. I really enjoy helping those less fortunate than myself and love to hear stories of others doing the same. This family has definitely earned their wings...

Happy Independence Day!!

I just wanted to wish everyone a safe and happy 4th of July. I'm at home this weekend soaking up the sun and fun of Birmingham!

Introducing...

Iteleport Apple's newest product...

although this is (currently) fictional, people were talking about it on TV last night. It got me thinking.... If had one, would I use it? Would I go back in time and change anything?

I would go back to that night in early June, 2003. I would forget that my heart had just been broken and pay a little more attention to the one who did it. I didn't know then, but my actions that night hurt you and hurt 'us'. I would be sober all night. I wouldn't let the words and boyish charm of another sweep me off my feet with many, many unfulfilled and empty promises. I wouldn't be so selfish... But I also would have missed out on a lot of lessons. Some necessary, others, not so much.

My life would certainly be different now if I could change that night, but what would that make me?

Ooooh oooh witchy woman

Thought for the day:

Why did we stop eating bugles? Is it b/c they no longer fit on my fat fingers as finger nails? They are a tasty treat.

This was Jennifer's thought, but it made me laugh so hard when the question was asked that i had to share!

My apartment is infested with koala bears

A small tribute to Mitch Hedberg 1968-2005, I sure did love that guy. And he loved our presents...

*I'm not making a banana bread, pastrami, cottage cheese sandwich. That would severely ruin my reputation!

*I got an ant farm...them fellas didn't grow shit.

*I hope the next time I move I get a real easy phone number, something that's real easy to remember. Something like two two two two two two two two. I would say "Sweet." And then people would say, "Mitch, how do I get a hold of you?" I'd say, "Just press two for a while. And when I answer, you will know you have pressed two enough."

*My roommate said to me, 'I'm gonna go shave and use the shower, does anyone need to use the bathroom?' It's like some weird ass quiz where he reveals the answer first.

*My friend asked me if I wanted a frozen banana, I said "no, but I want a regular banana later, so ... yeah".

*Last week I helped my friend stay put. It's a lot easier'n helpin' 'em move. I just went over to his house and made sure that he did not start to load shit into a truck.

*Whenever I go to shave, I assume there's someone else on the planet shaving, so I say, "I'm gonna go shave, too."

*On a stop light green means go and yellow means slow down, but on a banana it's just the opposite. Green means hold on, yellow means go ahead, and red means, 'where the fuck did you get that banana at?'

*I never joined the army because "at ease" never seemed that easy to me. It seemed rather uptight, still. I do not relax by putting my arms behind my back and parting my legs slightly, that does not equal ease to me. At ease is not being in the military. I'm eased bro, cause I'm not in the military.

*When you buy a box of Ritz crackers, on the back of the box, they have all these suggestions as to what to put on top of the Ritz. "Try it with turkey and cheese. Try it with peanut butter." But I like crackers man, that's why I bought it, 'cause I like crackers! I don't see a suggestion to put a Ritz on top of a Ritz. I didn't buy them because they're little edible plates! You've got no faith in the product itself.

*I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it.

*I was walking down the street with my friend and he said, "I hear music", as if there is any other way you can take it in. You're not special, that's how I receive it too. I tried to taste it but it did not work.

*I haven't slept for ten days, because that would be too long.

*I think Bigfoot is blurry, that's the problem. It's not the photographer's fault. Bigfoot is blurry, and that's extra scary to me. There's a large out of focus monster roaming the countryside. Look out, he's fuzzy, let's get out of here.

*This shirt is "dry-clean only"...which means it's dirty.

*My lucky number is four billion. That doesn't come in real handy when you're gambling. "Come on four billion! Fuck! Seven. Not even close. I need some more dice. Four billion divided by six, at least."

*I saw some two-dollar bills, today. They were for sale for eight dollars. Something went severely wrong there. What happened? It spun out of control. Now it's worth eight, still says "two".

*One time, this guy handed me a picture of him, he said,"Here's a picture of me when I was younger." Every picture of you is when you were younger. "Here's a picture of me when I'm older." "You son-of-a-bitch! How'd you pull that off? Lemme see that camera!"

*If you boat a lot you are known as a boating enthusiast. I like to boat, but I just don't ever want to be referred to as a boating enthusiast. I hope they call me a guy that likes to boat.

*Sometimes I wave to people I don't know. It's very dangerous to wave to someone you don't know because what if they don't have a hand? They'll think you're cocky. "Look what I got motherfucker! This thing is useful. I'm gonna go pick something up!"

*If carrots got you drunk, rabbits would be fucked up.

*I wrote a script and gave it to a guy that reads scripts. And he read it and said he really likes it, but he thinks I need to rewrite it. I said, "Fuck that, I'll just make a copy."

*My apartment is infested with koala bears. Its the cutest infestation ever. Much better than cockroaches.

*I like vending machines 'cuz snacks are better when they fall. If I buy a candy bar at a store, oftentimes, I will drop it so that it achieves it's maximum flavor potential.

*I drank some boiling water 'cuz I wanted to whistle

*Fish are always eating other fish. If fish could scream, the ocean would be loud as shit. You would not want to submerge your head, nothing but fish going "Ahhh, fuck! I thought I looked like that rock!"

*I can't tell you what hotel I'm stayin' in, but I can say that there are two trees involved. They said, "Let's call this hotel "Something...Tree", so they had a meeting; it was very short. "How 'bout Tree?" "No, Double Tree." "Hell yeah! Meeting adjourned!" I had my heart set on "Quadruple Tree"... damnit, we were almost there!

*I want to hang a map of the world in my house then I’m gonna put pins into all the locations that I’ve travelled to. But first I’m gonna have to travel to the top two corners of the map so it won’t fall down

*If you find yourself lost in the woods, fuck it!, build a house. Well, I was lost but now I live here. I have severely improved my predicament.

*I order the club sandwich all the time, but I'm not even a member, man. I don't know how I get away with it

*...went to a pizzeria, I ordered a slice of pizza, the fucker gave me the smallest slice possible. If the pizza was a pie chart for what people would do if they found a million dollars, the fucker gave me the "donate it to charity" slice. I would like to exchange this for the "keep it!"

*I saw this wino, he was eating grapes. I was like, "Dude, you have to wait."

*I ordered a chicken sandwich but I think the waitress mis-understood me because she said, "How would you like your eggs?" So I tried to answer her anyhow. I said "Incubated, and then raised, and then beheaded, and then plucked and then cut up then put onto a grill then put onto a bun. Shit, it's gonna take awhile. I don't have time, scrambled!"

**Visit Mitch's website for more on Mitch and to purchase CDs, DVDs, and funny funny T-shirts.**

"Lick the stamp, turn on"

Hippies believe(d) that the pursuit of money interferred with a fufulling life.

The summer of love - San Francisco, CA 1967 - There were many things wrong with America at this time, and the hippies, the counter culture, were there to show America that you didn't need money, a job, a home or anything else "the man" said you were supposed to have. As a sub-culture, the hippies of 1967 created their own declaration of independence; their creation endows us with certain inalienable rights and among these are "freedom of body, the pursuit of joy and the expansion of consciousness." Unfortunately, many of the ideals from that time are no longer ideal. The hippies of 1967 thought they could change the world, and make it a better place. In some ways, they succeeded...

The following is an excerpt from The Oracle, a prevalent hippie magazine from San Francisco:

"We are all -- squares and the psychedelically enlightened alike -- involved in our world of now. To take up the call, to respond to the cosmic forces, we must be the hard-working, harmonious, respectful, honest, diligent, co-operative family of man. Our words are inspired. Our feeling is deep and complete. Our devotion is strong. The precious revelations which have come through us with increasing magnitude must be fathomed until we are one with each other and can extend our awareness beyond the tribe to our entire planet.
What is the natural karmic duty of a generation whose brothers, neighbors, and childhood friends now promote hate by killing innocent human beings around the world? It is to balance their jive and immature actions with the light of intelligent goodness; fearlessly to deal with the money-mad machine in order to release its hold on our bowels -- the bowels of mankind.
Practically, this means that all excess profit is turned back into the community. That means all money, material things, food, etc., which are beyond the basic necessities of a happy, healthy, human existence..."

Life is a viscious cycle and this time is upon us again. We are in the midst of our generation's Veitnam, so I ask, What is our natural karmic duty? Take up the call. Lick the stamp, turn on.

η ευτυχία είναι ελεύθερη

Happiness is Free... take this time, this opportunity to do what truly makes you happy. Life is happening all around you, make yours count.

Unfortunately, this is a lot easier said than done... what makes me happy? I have an inate need to help people. Currently, not one thing I do in a day helps someone in a valuable way. Sure, sometimes I can explain someone's insurance payment to them or review someone's hearing test....that's not happiness.

Happiness to me is being a part of something; something that makes a difference; something with a purpose...

Today think about what truly makes you happy and set out to do it.

Welcome to Mississippi

I just witnessed a grown woman buying a CASE of Natty Light at the grocery store....

I, an obvious connaisseur of beer, have not even seen anyone drinking this outside of college - and those that did it then were either too young or too broke to know what they were drinking.

If I'm going to waste my time and my calories on beer, it's not going to be Natty Light....

...waiting...

Qualities I really dislike about myself are my impatience and fear of the unknown. When something is in limbo, I cannot stand it! There are quite a few variables in my life right now that can and will completely change everything, but what can I do? WAIT!

If I am supposed to be in Memphis then I should stay. But there's the "job thing", plus I'm supposed to start school in the Fall (getting a BSN). I've been admitted, but apparently they still haven't completed my transfer eval! I'm probably about to have to move (in town), but I don't know. And if I do have to move, I don't know if it will be immediately or in August when Landon's lease is up. I'd much rather just live by myself...but even more than that, I'd rather not live in Memphis...

I think that I've gotten everything out of this city that I can and it's time to move on.

My most perfect and ideal job is in Shreveport. It's not the one I initially applied for, but this one is far better and is the one they wanted to talk to me about...BUT I probably won't know anything about it until at least August - did I mention I hate waiting?

Then there is home. Everyone has a different definition of home, but for me, at this time in my life, home is being where my friends and family are. Home is Birmingham. I need to be there. At least for a minute.

So what to do? Nothing. All I can do is wait. And I despise waiting! In a perfect world everything would just fall into place - today. Even if the actions wouldn't take place for a month or 2 (or longer) at least I would know, I could stop worrying, and get on with life.

I should stop waiting. waiting for my (new) life to begin and just start living - because like it or not, this is life. I just wish that it was a little more cut and dry...

Lesson for Today

Adding a little rum to a smoothie never hurt anyone...

Girl's Day Out

Yesterday (for Birthday part II) Kaiya, my 6 year old cousin, and I planned a girls day! It was so much fun! We went and got her a haircut, then we both got manis and pedis. After that, we picked up Nana (my aunt) and Landon (her brother) and went to the mall. We were supposed to see a movie there, but the one we wanted to see wasn't playing. :-( All in all it was a great day!

Happy Birthday to ME

So today is my birthday... I'm 28. For a minute no one believed me (compliment?), in fact I heard someone say (seriously?) that I was 19...wow! To be 19 again.... I digress.

I was certain that this birthday was going to be kind of sucky because my plans to go home were nixed - damn $4.00 gas! Plus my aunt was going out of town with my mom so that was one less person to celebrate with me, well it turns out that she didn't go - sadly I don't get Panera when she comes back, but that's really the only downfall.

When I got to work this morning, my office door was decorated, the wall had a sign, and there was CAKE and a present for me!! It was such a wonderful surprise! And I can't forget the birthday SHOT - literal shot [(B-12) it's good for you], of course, not the shot I was looking for...I really appreciate everyone (especially Tammy and Joy) for making me feel so special today!

I have gotten emails, texts, and Facebook and Myspace messages throughout the day which have made the day even better! I just want to thank my friends for being here for me and making this day so special!

UPDATE: I walked into my office around 2:15 or so and I had this beautiful flower arrangement and birthday balloon sitting on my desk! My bestest friend in the whole wide world sent me flowers!! **I don't know if you know how much that means to me, but Jennifer!!! Thanks lady, I love you! And the card - you're right.... IT'S ALL ABOUT ME.
When I got home, the kids had a surprise for me... a strawberry cake! They were so proud!! The last picture is of Kaiya and Landon posing with their (my) cake!

Thanks!! (or rather Thank,s)

Older and Wiser - Amanda

Tenderness and Curiosity

I received an email this morning from a woman who recently attended a workshop led by Tobi Fishel, Ph.D., called Women's Grace and Beauty:

...Following introductions there was one request made of each participant: bring only tenderness and curiosity into the day's experiences. Sounded simple enough but quickly the chatter of self-talk inside my head suggested otherwise. When I started paying attention to the mental noise (...work, family, shopping lists, errands I needed to run and those I'd forgotten about...) there was very little tenderness and curiosity to be found. I realized the thoughts inside my head resembled something of a mental boxing ring. With the introduction of gentleness and intrigue, I felt a shift in energy, both internal and external...

Today my 'mental noise' is very loud... I've got a lot going on, a lot of unanswered questions, and my tomorrow is my birthday - I'm still trying to deal with that... I am going to try to respond to this noise with tenderness and curiosity (those unanswered questions in particular). I know the task at hand is a hard one, especially with the day to day of work, family, and everything that goes along with it, but it is something that I can do - this I am sure.

[To whom it may concern: get your shit together and when you figure out what you want, please, by all means, let me know. I know what I want, now it's your turn] real tender, right? at least i'm curious...

With that being said...today, pay attention to your own mental noise and respond only with tenderness and curiosity.

Weekend Schmeekend

I've done a lot of reminiscent movie watching this weekend and was lucky enough to watch two of my favorite movies!

The First, Chasing Amy - a Kevin Smith classic. I can quote the whole movie, yet it never gets old.

I just finished watching A Lot Like Love with Amanda Peet and Ashton Kutcher. I love this movie. I can't even explain why! I am quite jaded and cynical and know that the chances of this happening in real life are slim to none, but this movie makes me cry EVERY TIME I watch it.

Not too sure what's next on the list, but I HIGHLY recommend adding both of these movies to your collection!

Got Something?

Want something? Anything? I stumbled upon this interesting site yesterday and thought I should share...SomethingStore - Surprise Yourself!

Place an order with the something store - everything costs $10 (no shipping); then in 7-10 days you'll get something! That's the best (or worst) part... you don't know what that something will be!

On their website they do show a variety of items they shipped that week and to which state - some of the items are worth much more than the $10 you give them, and of course, some are worth much less. It's a gamble. Are you willing to take it?

A good friend and I used to mail each other care packages nearly weekly after college, just a note and some nick nacks that made us think of one another, unfortunately as time passed, so did this tradition.... I think we're about to start back up again... she just doesn't know it yet. :-)

What's your personal motto?

A question asked yesterday by my little 5 year old cousin...
He (Landon) turned to his sister and said, "Kaiya, what's your personal motto?"

Kaiya answered, "If you can't do something right the first time, you gotta keep trying!"

He turned to my aunt, "Nana, what's your personal motto?"

"If you want something done right, do it yourself," she replied.

Then he asked me, I told him that my personal motto is Happiness is Free (something I'm sure I'll delve into later).

So then I asked, "Landon, what is your personal motto?" His reply was so classic -

"DANG!"

Sweet Home Alabama?

As much as I like Memphis and everything it has done for me, there are some things that just can't beat HOME. Technically my home is Birmingham and I can't wait to get back there - but any move closer to the Magic City has got to be better than the 3.5 hours I have to drive now... A friend called me a few weeks ago to make sure she could give my contact information to someone in Montgomery about a job... Of course I said "YES" without hesitiation. (you see, this is a job I "interviewed" for back in October and would LOVE to have...even with all the major responsibility that comes with it)

It turns out that the Montgomery CoC (Continuum of Care) is thinking about making the switch to the same web-based HMIS system that the rest of the State of Alabama uses. Not only do the other CoCs use the same system, but they have formed PromisAL, which essentially allows each Continuua to talk. Not to toot my own horn, but when I was in Birmingham, I worked on this system and was also integral in forming PromisAL by helping to write the SOPs and Policies & Procedures for the State (and our CoC in Birmingham).

If Montgomery makes the switch, they want me, yes ME, to head their HMIS! This all depends on whether or not the agencies want to make the switch to the new system, which will be like pulling teeth regardless, and even more importantly, it depends on if they can afford me. Meaning do they have any money to pay me... Unfortunately living ain't easy or cheap. Apparently they won't be making a final decision until the end of the month, but today I found out that most of the agencies think that switching to ServicePoint would be a good idea.

Now there's just that matter of money...

Everybody's got a Mountain to Climb

While driving in to work this morning, the Allman Brothers', Everybody's Got a Mountain to Climb began to play, it really got me thinking...

I have realized that there are many uphill battles in life, and no matter how bad I think I may have it, or if I think the world is against me, because (god forbid) things don't go my way, I know that everyone is going through their own struggles and hardships...

I moved to Memphis with little more than a suitcase in hand just over six months ago. This story could have gone one of two ways...Luckily, for me, I have a wonderful support system in my family. They took me in, fed me, gave me a place to sleep, and waited on me to find a job.



This was not the "norm" for me. Prior to Memphis, I have been living on my own, or with a "significant other" for the past 10 years. I made a nice little life for myself. I had all of the material things that I no longer have - a bed (that I own), furniture, a tv, a computer, I even had quite a few nice things - and a kitchen that I could cook a mean meal in... let me tell you! Before this turns into a pity party story, I lost all of those things... through very little fault of my own (although my ex-husband my disagree), but what I gained in return is irreplaceable! I have been able to regain friendships that I had lost or that were strained, and I got my family back. I have also regained my self respect and confidence (or at least some of it).

In Birmingham, I worked as an HMIS (Homeless Management Information System) system administrator, this job afforded me many chances to interact with the homeless men and women of Birmingham, to hear their stories and to share in their joys as well as their pain. Although I have a huge uphill battle to regain my security (in more ways than one), remembering my time in Birmingham helps me keep my woes in perspective.


Everybody's Got A Mountain to Climb by The Allman Brothers Band



This road we travel gets a little tough sometimes,
Sometimes I know you feel like you cant go on,
Need somebody help you get back home,
Need a friend to help you find your way home.
Reverend pearly brown say theres peace out on the water at night,
Big sun going down, lord its a pretty sight,
Red and blue across the water makes a wonderful song,
Listen to it all night long.


Everybodys got a mountain to climb,
Dont be discouraged when the sun dont shine,
Gotta keep on pulling, you gotta keep on tryin,
Everybodys got a mountain to climb,
Everybodys got a mountain to climb.

Who'd cross the face of a little smilin child?
Take away the losers one last chance?
Who wouldnt linger down by the old river for a while?
You know the whole world loves you when youre dancin.
So, hey let me tell you what Im talkin about,
You cant go around with your lip stuck out.
Life aint all good but it sure aint bad,
Anyway its the best old life I ever had.

Everybodys got a mountain to climb,
Dont be discouraged when the sun dont shine,
Gotta keep on pulling, you gotta keep on tryin,
Everybodys got a mountain to climb.
Everybodys got a mountain to climb,
Dont be discouraged when the sun dont shine,
Gotta keep on pulling, you gotta keep on tryin,
Everybodys got a mountain to climb.


**and THIS is what makes it all worth it**

The water's just fine

"No person ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and she's not the same person." - Heraclitus

Think about it: If you dip your toe into the river and remove it and then immediately dip your toe back into the water, you are now experiencing a different stream. Like the river, we too are alive and constantly in the process of change. None of us is the same person we were yesterday; we're not even the same person we were an hour ago.

Today, in this moment, embrace the reality that you and everything around you is in a constant state of flux - everything is always in the process of change. Realize the possibility and freedom that the constancy of change offers you. None of us is without hope. None of us knows enough to be a pessimist. Every bad moment will soon pass. And every good moment must be celebrated and cherished in the moment, for it too will soon pass, opening a fresh opportunity in which to dip your toe. Again, I borrowed this from someone much more insightful than myself, but it is true and really spoke to me. Everything around me is changing and I am in a constant state of limbo. This may be why I have had a pretty sorry week (or at least partly to blame). It's been pretty bad for those around me, I've tried (kind of hard) not to let my mood effect them. For the most part, I think it has worked, but really, I've just laid low and kept to myself. Not to go on and on - but the lesson is, I know that this will pass and something better will come along - it always does. That's life. The hard part is just sticking it out until things turn your way.

Limited Perspective?

I'm not going to lie - I have plagerized every word of what you are about to read, I get weekly emails from EDCT and this week I really took what they said to heart...

Contemplating a new way of thinking or seeing is tricky. A fascinating story that demonstrates this is that of Christopher Columbus sailing to the Americas. Because the never before seen ships were unfamiliar to the indigenous people, they could not see the ships on the horizon. It is hard to believe that we, too, could miss that which is right before our eyes. What are we closed off to simply because we've already made up our minds, have limited perspective, or lack all the information necessary to be aware of them?

Today, open yourself up to seeing all the possibilities

Software is not Soft

I have learned many things is my *almost* 28 years, but things never cease to amaze me.

Today I learned that no matter how slowly I try to do my work, I am just TOO damn efficient and now I have to pretend to work for the next 3 hours and 18 minutes. That is a very long time. Fortunately for me, I do have 3 very informative workbooks to read, one of which I started yesterday but nearly fell asleep from the boredom. Although, I did learn that "Software is not soft". No, I am not kidding, I should probably site my quote, but I don't have that information readily available. I'm lying, I have it, I'm just lazy.

I learned that just because it is a better deal to buy 2 for $2 candy bars if 1 is $1.49, it's not always the best idea. I didn't need the first one to begin with, I certainly don't need two! At least I brought carrots...

I have learned that I am someone who seems to go out of my way to avoid confrontation. I know, I know. I think I've found some sort of inner peace or something similar to it, and in most cases, just the thought of an argument or confrontation literally makes me sick to my stomach.

I have learned that occasionally when you think someone is crazy, they are. Like certifiably crazy. When you realize this, do something to help them. If they won't listen, find someone they will listen to - that, or run the other way! Hopefully they'll find the help they need and eventually maybe they'll thank you. Who knows?

I have learned how important friends and family are for my mental health. I have never felt as good as I do now. For those who do not have the luxury of friends and family, meds are also good. What am I saying? Meds are probably good regardless.

I have learned that the telephone isn't always the best way to communicate. Sometimes this makes me a bad friend, and for that, I am sorry. I love to write and receive letters. In the mail. Like, from the mailman. Send me your addressif you'd like one. Sometimes I don't have too much to say so I just need to text you, but I don't have unlimited texting, I am not made of money, not even a little bit. Also bedtime in my house is very early, so sometimes I have been asleep for hours by the time some of you night owls decide it's a good time to call. While I do appreciate the call, and the message, some more than you know, I am very bad about returning the calls, and for that, I am sorry.

"your welcome"

On the Way to New Orleans

I saw this awesome sign on the way to New Orleans the last time I went..... Wow! It made me giggle. So just in case you were wondering:

....now you know.